Office hours [all day]

[sith_happened]

Anakin was in his office after his weekly meeting with Ben, per usual, but this time we was sitting cross-legged on the floor putting together a very large, synthflesh-covered nanny droid.

No one had ever accused him of having a normal home life, no.

The door was open.

Comments

[sith_happened]

"It's not a bad holiday," Anakin said, "even if the pageants are completely insane."

He and Luke had almost gotten banned from the one in Stars Hollow for laughing in the wrong parts. Oops.

[solo_sword]

Um.

"Pageants?"

[sith_happened]

Anakin nodded. "To explain how the tiny god was born and then the fat man comes and delivers presents to the deserving," he said.

[solo_sword]

Jaina stared. She knew he wasn't lying, or that he didn't think he was, but... she had absolutely nothing.

Therefore, staring.

[sith_happened]

He shrugged. "Weird planet. They also grant the fat man some sort of powers that allow him to deliver presents to the entire world all in one night. And he watches you while you're sleeping."

[solo_sword]

"He does not watch me when I'm sleeping," Jaina said quickly. Because then she'd have to kill a fat man because no.

[sith_happened]

"I think it might only apply to natives of Earth," Anakin added helpfully.

[solo_sword]

"What does a fat man have anything to do with a tiny god?" she wondered.

[sith_happened]

"Maybe he was one of the presents in his sack?" Anakin suggested.

[solo_sword]

"...The man was his own present?"

[sith_happened]

"It's a god. Like those stories ever make sense."

[solo_sword]

"Hey, my goddess stuff makes total sense." Because you're a fake one, Jaina. "Why's anyone watching natives while they're sleeping?"

She couldn't stop being curious. This was bad.

[sith_happened]

"To find out if they are worthy to receive gifts at the end of the year, apparently. They must be sufficiently 'good'."

[solo_sword]

"So you get stalked in exchange for a reward? Can you opt out?"

[sith_happened]

"I think you might age out?" Anakin said thoughtfully. "It's mostly aimed at children, which is just another level of creepy. Why is an old fat man staring at children?"

[solo_sword]

"..." She didn't want to know. "And they base a holiday around this?"

[sith_happened]

"Yes," Anakin said. "And look forward to it!"

[solo_sword]

Jaina frowned. A lot. "I think I have to be very careful saying something insulting about the holiday to his family."

Jaina, no. You are not allowed to be cheerful about a holiday in which you think a miniature god delivered a fat man unto himself to stalk children to see whether they deserve a present or not.

[sith_happened]

"It's something they've grown up with," Anakin said, nodding. "They don't think it's weird. Be diplomatic."

[solo_sword]

Jaina snorted. "I'll be too busy trying not to Force-thwap Nancy as me trying to be diplomatic. I don't think I can do both."

[sith_happened]

"Who's Nancy?" Anakin asked.

[solo_sword]

"Family friend," she said, and hey, she could be diplomatic. "She kept showing up for John here, and now we're BFF's!"

No, really, the fake perky tone Jaina could take on when talking about Nancy was a little disturbing.

[sith_happened]

"That's a really disturbing tone," Anakin commented. "Not a fan, I take it."

[solo_sword]

"I'd like to hit her till she cries."

[sith_happened]

"So, once?" Anakin guessed with a tight smile.