Office hours [all day]

[sith_happened]

After a workout with Ben (and after missing last week, Ben had apparently had a lot of energy to expend. Anakin had been hard-pressed to counter for a few minutes there), Anakin unlocked his office and began to add pictures of Juliet in her lobster Halloween costume to the gradually becoming insane level of other photos of his family hung on the walls and clustered on his desk.

The door was open.

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[trigons_child]

Raven was starting to feel guilty about coming to Anakin every week with her newest trauma. But this one especially was unsettling (to say the least), so after Aeryn's class (and that resulting new trauma), she went by his office as usual. Shields were at maximum because she was still worried about accidentally influencing someone with her gifts. She was doing her best to be a void of emotion.

[sith_happened]

Anakin glanced up from his pictures. "Come in, Raven," he said with a tiny smile.

[trigons_child]

Raven had led a lobster-free existence until now, so she wasn't sure what to make of the pictures of Juliet. "Is that Juliet's Halloween costume?" she asked as she entered, tilting her head and trying to figure out what manner of creature the red outfit was. Some sort of red bug? Surely it was not a demon.

[sith_happened]

Anakin smiled fondly at the photo. "She was a lobster," he said. "It's a food on this planet."

Beat.

"But we don't eat children."

Another beat.

"Rory picked it out?"

[trigons_child]

Raven wasn't going to even try to understand dressing up as an object of food. Particularly one that looked like a giant bug. She was just lucky she hadn't run into a "sexy lobster" over Halloween. "She looks very cute," she did say sincerely.

[sith_happened]

"Thank you," Anakin said. "She looks like her mother."

He pointed to the chair in front of his desk. "How was your week?"

[trigons_child]

Raven chose not to ask if Rory had been a lobster for Halloween as well.

She settled in the chair, looking down at her hands in her lap. "It...was not good," she admitted.

[sith_happened]

"How not good?" Anakin asked, frowning.

[trigons_child]

"I used my gifts without realizing it," Raven said quietly. "It was not intentional, but I did not realize I was projecting my desires and affecting others...until I was told by someone who could sense it."

[sith_happened]

Anakin reached up to massage the bridge of his nose. "What did you have them doing?"

[trigons_child]

Empathic teenagers, the number once cause of headaches in Fandom.

Raven's face flushed with embarrassment. "I desired affection," she murmured. "I never would have done anything consciously. I know that is as wrong as using my powers to cause harm."

[sith_happened]

From the far reaches of Anakin's memories came an image of Angel practically chasing him around the common room, trying to declare his love, and Anakin fought back and unholy shriek of laughter.

"So that would explain some of the reports on the radio, then," he said evenly.

[trigons_child]

"It was on the radio?" Raven said, feeling more humiliated now. Maybe she'd have to start listening to find out just what was being said about her.

[sith_happened]

Anakin sent a wave of reassurance toward her. "Nothing bad," he said. "Your name was just mentioned more frequently than usually happens."

Yes, he paid that kind of obsessive attention.

[trigons_child]

"I was enjoying the attention," Raven said. "I did not realize that I was causing it to happen myself until Lady Aphrodite told me."

[sith_happened]

"And what's the blowback been like?" Anakin asked quietly.

[trigons_child]

"I have only spoken two -- well, three, but one was a bunny at the time," Raven said. Don't ask. "Francine was understandably angry because I had affected Katchoo. And Hurley...did not care." She was dreading seeing Jono the most.

[sith_happened]

"And how much guilt have you dumped onto your own shoulders for this, young one?" Anakin asked.

When clearly it should be on Anakin's for being an inadequate teacher, in his mind.

[trigons_child]

"This should not have happened," Raven said, shaking her head. "I should have known what I was doing. I should not have wanted so much. I had been trying to hard at keeping others emotions out that I did not keep my own inside."

[sith_happened]

"We'll work on it," Anakin said. "You had quite a shock to your system last week. I should have been more vigilant in making sure you were all right."

[trigons_child]

"It is not your fault," Raven said. "The blame is all mine. I became jealous of the affection that others had for one another and wanted to experience it myself. But I would never consciously use my gifts to force that. I should have realized something was wrong when so many said they cared for me. I can only hope they will forgive me and believe that I did not do what I did intentionally."

[sith_happened]

"They should," Anakin said quietly. "There are certainly those here with powers to do such things intentionally."

[trigons_child]

"I will never allow such a thing to happen again," Raven promised. "I will control my desires." Or deny, same difference. "And...I apologize for disappointing you again."

[sith_happened]

"There's no again," Anakin said, trying to meet her eyes. "It was an accident. You were pushed too far last week. Mistakes happen."

[trigons_child]

"How do I know I have not been doing this all along?" Raven said, trying to keep her gaze steady. "I am very concerned about that now."

[sith_happened]

"I think someone would have complained by now if you had been," Anakin replied steadily, "and I think I would have noticed something."

[trigons_child]

That was reassuring at least. "I did not encounter Ben or Tahiri or Jaina while I was projecting," Raven said, nodding. "They would have noticed as well, would they not?"

[sith_happened]

Anakin nodded. "They've certainly been trained to do so," he said.

[trigons_child]

"That is a relief," Raven said with a sigh that said as much. "I did not want to have to question if my every friendship was real or forced upon another due to my gifts."

[sith_happened]

They aren't, young one," Anakin said with a little smile. "Don't mistrust yourself that far."

[trigons_child]

"I will try not to," Raven said. "Though I fear if people start acting out of character in the future, I may be one of the first eyes turn to. But I have been trying to turn my shields inward as well as out to stop myself from projecting my desires onto others without realizing it."

[sith_happened]

"Today we'll work on managing both at the same time," Anakin replied, nodding.